A Side of Green Beans

Trust me, after this post, you'll never hear think of a green bean casserole again without blushing and choking. Don't say you haven't been warned.



A dear friend of ours lost her husband a few months ago, and I've been over to visit her a few times to offer a shoulder or an ear. The amazing thing is that I come home feeling like I've done nothing for her but everything for me. She's one of those people. And then I feel guilty because who goes to visit the widowed for their own personal encouragement?

This wonderful lady is the kind that gives you sage advice without telling you how to run your life. And you know to listen intently because she knows what she's talking about. We talk in depth about raising kids in today's world and my fears for my young teens. We talk about the dangers and pitfalls not only for kids but adults as well. We talk about marriage. And she told me how important it is to keep your marriage healthy and strong. In all areas.

In short, what I got from her was the fact that marriage is a lot of work, but well worth it. I know this, of course. I've been happily married for 16 years. I got that sometimes you have to give 269% of yourself and never, ever give less than 100%. I got that giving of yourself is something that is not optional, in any form. Not at mealtimes, not at bedtimes, not at the in between times when you're busy raising toddlers and life is chaos and you're too tired to wipe the baby snot off your shirt.

On those days especially, one has to work at marriage. I mean, it's easy to make a romantic candlelight dinner when you're well rested and the kids are at sleepovers elsewhere. It's easy to carry over that meal to the bedroom, and serve another helping of, um, green beans. It's easy to make your husband happy when things are going well.

But there are too many of the other days. Take, for instance, the other night at our place. I've been staying up waaaaaay too late at night. And working like a mad woman to get things done through the day. And generally wearing myself out to the point that the baby snot is looking like the best part of my ensemble. Tis the season to be overworked, you know?

So I finally drag myself to bed and it's after midnight again. I'm exhausted enough to be nearly asleep before hitting the pillow, but realize that Sam is kinda hinting for a side of green beans. It's not that I dont' want to, mind you, but my alarm goes off way too early when I'm up way too late. And he was off the next day which means he got to sleep in. So I made a deal. If I served green beans, he got up with the kids in the morning.

Can you believe that he rolled over and went to sleep? And I thought we had a good thing going with our marriage.

And while that was bad, I think I'm actually more insulted by what happened several days after that. Having just had some green beans, he dug in his pants pocket and handed me a dollar. A dollar!

He says it was Micah's dollar but it sure looks suspicious. I'm now a cheap date. How nice.

23 comments:

caramama said...

He picked sleeping in over green beans! Hysterical!

Now, that's never happened in our house. Noooooo. Never. I swear. (You hear the sarcasm, right? Cause it's happened a few times on both our sides.)

Trannyhead said...

I feel fairly confident that my husband would also choose sleep. Though that is only because he knows I'd cave and provide the green beans anyway. I never turn them down. He'd probably choose sleep, roll over, and then I'd roll his arse back over again! Anyway, HAWT post. I approve.

(Keri) Auburn Gal Always said...

Oh no. This post started out so nicely. I was wondering what sort of advice she was giving you about your, ahem, marriage and how she used green beans as an euphamism (sp?). And then it just end with a dollar.

The Mighty Hunter would give up sleep for 3 weeks for green beans, I think. He never sleeps in, unless he has had food poisoning or the flu. This time of year, hunting season, he wakes up at dawn better than a rooster. Thankfully, he learned to value his life and TIPTOE out of the bedroom and NOT wake me up that early.

I think I'll click "Publish" and go give him his green beans for the night. wink wink

Michelle said...

Ha! I actually have provided that exact scenario to my husband ... and he also chose sleep. The next night though, we both had our fill of green beans. Nice post, Karen ;)

PT-LawMom said...

LOL! I would probably have done the same as your husband. Sleep is goooood. Still, green beans are better. ;) Problem with marriage is that it's easy to think they will always be there tomorrow. May you have many, many nights with sleepovers to have romantic time with your hubby.

anglophilefootballfanatic.com said...

I'm insulted on your behalf. Shame on the spouse for paying you for the beans. Like I said already. Yell out Jamie.

utmomof5 said...

HA! That is one funny post! Sometimes green beans are way better than sleep!! Other times I really need sleep. Next time tell him the price has gone up to at least a nice dinner!

the planet of janet said...

wonderhubby is an 8-hours-of-sleep guy. he'd also choose sleep (except on the weekends... then all bets are off!)

Karen said...

I don't know what mine would have done in that senario. I guess it depends on how bad he was craving those green beans. If I had to guess....he would have probably chosen sleep and then lauched a sneak attack around 2 AM for those green beans when my radar was down.

Aimee said...

I pick sleep over green beans all the time.

And he gave you a whole dollar? You must have really cooked those green beans, honey.

Now you only have to serve green beans three and a half more times and you'll have earned enough for a nice coffee :)

Susan said...

Throw some cheddar cheese on top next time and maybe he'll give in and give you $2!

(...the cheddar on top of the BEANS, Karen, the beans -- not you. God knows you don't need more stuff pasted on your clothes, temptress that you are :) )

Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Melissa said...

LOL! I would have been serving up some green beans.

I'm so thinking of your sex life (or lack there of) the next time I eat green bean casserole...which should be some time this afternoon...yikes!

Jenn said...

Good Lord , that's funny! My hubby does that too sometimes!

Putz said...

i am thankful for christmas trolls, and megan my granddaughter

Karen Deborah said...

that is so hilarious. I think I would've kicked him. For the dollar thing. The green bean thing,well I have never associated vegetables with that part of marriage. In my marriage it was the reverse he was tired, oh well. Now I'm getting far enuf into menopause that I can take it or leave it. Maybe your husband is also in menopause? just kidding.

rebelliousflaw said...

So are the green beans just regular green beans? Or are they those green beans that wind up in a spectacular green bean casserole?

Maybe you can blame it on the triptophan (sp) in the turkey.

Shellie said...

I know just how you feel.

Caution Flag said...

Green beans can be over-rated at times. It just that you weren't even hungry, but you were willing to cook for him and he wasn't willing to straighten the kitchen afterward. That hurts. But the dollar thing? That's a sweet tea at McDonalds. Now that is worth cooking for in my book.

imbeingheldhostage said...

wow, even I (the old one) get a few £20 notes on the nightstand once in a while... we need to talk. Great fun K!

HalfAsstic.com said...

Yeah, MEN! The falling asleep instead of agreeing to get up with the kids is sooo typical!
Getting the dollar for services rendered is hilarious!

Keri said...

My hubbie would have taken the green beans and then feigned ignorance as to what the kids needed in the morning so i would be forced to give up my 'bounty' and get up early anyways...
hmmm... funny how that always happens...

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Huh...wonder which my hubby would choose? Cute post!

Colleen said...

That is hilarious! I may have to try that next time I'm bothered for some green bean casserole after a very long day. ;)