Literally

**Warning - today's content involves poop. If you are sensitive in nature you may not want to read this. It could be disgusting.** End warning.


Our 10 year old son is extremely literal. I should have figured this out long ago, but being slow and blonde it sometimes takes me a while to catch on to things.

The first clue was when he was 2 years old and we put him in his big-boy bed from the crib. Like every toddler with newfound freedom, he got out of bed and happily roamed the house. I caught him, lightly tapped his tiny diapered hiney and said "no, you have to stay in bed." This only happened once or twice more before he caught on and stayed in bed until he fell asleep for his nap. I was thrilled with his quick grasp of the situation and obedience. Fast forward to later in the afternoon, and I saw him lying in bed awake. I figured he'd just woke up and was still trying to orient himself. About 10 minutes later I walked by and same thing. He then asked if he could get out of bed. Poor guy thought he had to stay until further notice.

And little things crop up here and there that remind me that he's so very literal. He does not get implications and sometimes it drives me crazy. And sometimes it's frustrating for both him and I. If I assume that he knows he's to do something, and he doesn't because I haven't spelled it out to the letter, it can get disturbingly difficult.

But I got quite a chuckle the other day when I walked in the bathroom and noticed a bit of poop on the floor. (No, THAT was not funny.) I knew he had just emerged from that particular bathroom so I asked him to come in so that I could confront him about it. How on earth does one dribble #2 on the floor?! And for heaven's sake, CLEAN IT UP!!! He said it must have dropped when he stood up to wipe.

Me: You stand up to wipe?
Him: Well, doesn't everyone?
Me: NO!!! Why would you think that?
Him: Because when I was little you would get me off the potty and stand me up to wipe.

Back to the literal. So when I was potty training him I'd stand him up to be sure everything was clean and shiny. It beat the kid having to balance himself while I was obviously trying to throw him off balance over a pit of water with excrement floating in it. And because that's what he was "taught" that's how he's been doing it all these years. Who knew? Wonder what else he's doing that I should perhaps know about.