Justified

When Micah was granted a wish through the Sunshine Foundation, we had a year to decide what we wanted granted. In that year, we talked about several options, and how Micah should choose his own wish, and how it was unfair that he couldn't talk to voice it. We discussed how cliche it is that families so often choose a trip to Disney, and yet Micah would probably love that. I mean, what kid doesn't dream in technicolor of going to the most magical place on earth?  What kid wouldn't love Disney?

And yet, is that what Micah would want? The boy is terrified of costumed characters, but loves amusement park rides. Disney would be appreciated by all our family, but was that choosing selfishly? Oh, the pros and cons.

We stayed by our decision, and I secretly questioned it right up until the day we left. Did I do this for Micah, or for myself? Once in Florida, there was no doubt that we'd made a choice that Micah was happy with. But now that we've been home for several months, and the magic is just a memory, I question again if we did right by our son. One trip, verses something like a pool that he could use year after year...

I have the Disney pictures on the computer as a screen saver. Micah will scroll through them ooh!ing and aaah!ing in appreciation. My desktop wallpaper is the picture of the family with Woody and Jessie. If I have a screen open, he will close it (without saving!) so that he can see the picture that makes him smile. I made a picture book of our trip. Micah will turn the pages and insist that everyone in the house look at this, or that, or even ask to have his picture taken holding the book up, showing me his favorite characters.

My concerns are completely laid to rest. Micah had the time of his life, and that's what granted wishes are all about. Being the parent of a nonverbal child is frustrating. Second guessing what he wants is routine. But it's always nice when your kid tells you that you did the right thing.

10 comments:

HalfAsstic.com said...

Oh, Karen it sounds to me like there can never be any questioning that you did the right thing for Micah.
He won't let you. :-)

Michelle said...

Awwww, that is so great that he has such great memories and really loved it so much. Even with a verbal child, it's still hard because they change their minds so much and can't really see past today. Parenting is never easy, but what a joy to know that you made the right choice!

Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

I know how hard it is to do right by three kids who are able to express themselves via speech, and cannot imagine what it must be like to be in your shoes! Yet another reason Micah is so very lucky to have you - you wear those shoes darn well!

And judging by the continued enthusiasm Micah has for the memories of that trip, I would say you made a fantastic decision!

Roger said...

I don't think that there would be any doubt that Micah got what he wanted, especially the way he is with your pictures, etc. Not to mention he has like a million Woody dolls, right?

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself either, as there is no one in the world that would think that you put yourself ahead of Micah, or any of your kids.

Now, you should be hard on yourself for not inviting me to come along. :)

Trisha said...

Memories can last a lifetime and Micah seems to be making his last that long! I love the way he is looking at the characters in the picture!

imbeingheldhostage said...

How? How can you make me all teary eyed over a Disney post?

Stop second-guessing yourself Karen, you have Micah's best interests covered.

Gina said...

It's awesome that he will have those memories forever. Getting to have an experience like that as a family is priceless.

Together We Save said...

So glad he enjoyed the trip... it is not selfish of you to have fun too.

SunflowerMom said...

I'm so glad he got so much out of his wish! It is hard guessing how they might react and wondering if you are making the right choice, but it is just so precious when you figure it out right!

Debbie in CA : ) said...

Beautiful pic! Perfect choice! Blessed boy! Lucky family!

With love from a kindred mom with a nonverbal boy whose smile lights up my life.

Choose with love and you will always make the right choice, sweet friend.

XO ~~ Debbie