Grocery Shopping With A Barrel Of Monkeys

December was a weird month for us. Awesome, but weird. The kids were in school one week, and have been home for 3 now. I think they're ready to go back. I always find it funny how Christmas break seems to last forever and ever and EVER and by the time the kids finally go back we're all ready for it to happen, but when April comes around, I'm just so ready for the kids to come home for summer already. And then I have a good month to go. And we love every single day we have together. I guess its the winter blahs that make us stir crazy over Christmas? Who knows. I just know its time for Micah to go back, and he's right there with me.

It's this state of being that I took to the grocery store with me today.

Micah at the grocery store is fun. And by fun I mean really helpful. And by helpful I mean it's like trying to keep track of a barrel of monkeys with octopus arms who throw things into the cart, knock things down, take your phone with your grocery list on it just for kicks, and walk off with the cart every 33.8 seconds while actually trying to get what's on your list in the first place. Once you locate your list again, that is.

My gosh. That should count as an Olympic sport. Grocery Shopping With Small Children. I'd medal in it.

Micah got really mad that we got dog food before we got eggs, and then he tried to get everything in triplicate because I asked him to get 3 boxes of spaghetti at the beginning of the adventure, so he took out his frustrations on the salad dressings. His herding instincts kicked in and he shoved all the bottles together, then pushed them to the back of the shelf where they pretended to hide like the toys under Sid's bed. So the Ranch, Lite Ranch, and Fat Free Ranch are all huddled helplessly at the back of the shelf together, waiting for someone to discover them. I tried to have Micah set them back up but that wasn't in his grand scheme. I set half of them up so that at least people knew where the Ranch was and the general populace didn't think there was a run on Ranch for the new year. Because that could be a thing.

This was about the time I decided I needed to be done shopping, and was desperately trying to wrap things up, after tracking down the errant boy again who was herding the salsa together on the opposite side of the aisle. We just needed to leave.

A kindly lady walked up to Micah and said, "that's an awesome shirt you have there. Did you get it for Christmas?" To which Micah replied. And replied. And waxed poetical while replying still more. And as the lady then excused herself and continued shopping, Micah tried tracking her down to introduce all of us. He pointed her out to us when we crossed paths with her again, and we pretended to be surprised (because we didn't just see it happen, you know). And then he started stalking her. I kid you not. He watched every move she made, and when she went down the cereal aisle, he was sure we needed to as well. Since we didn't get there before she exited there and went to the canned goods, Micah then decided that we needed some creamed corn. Right now. And hurry. While it was pretty cute, it seriously got to the point where I had to throw squirrels in Micah's direction to distract him until he forgot about the kind lady.

And then I wondered why I didn't just let him follow her all over the store. My shopping would have been easier, faster, and done. And she would have returned him, because shopping with that boy is all sorts of fun. And by fun I mean helpful. And by helpful I mean...