I See the Light

Because of the way our kids are spaced, I have been changing diapers every single day for over 14 years. In hindsight, I should have bought stock in Huggies.

I've had this potty training theory that I formulated when Becky was almost 2. I was due with Josh a few months after her second birthday and figured it would be so very nice to get her potty trained before he came along. She showed interest in all things potty, so we took the next step. Turns out, she wasn't as ready for that step as I was. It was then that I formulated a potty training theory of my own.

It's easier to wait until a child is ready than to fight them until they're ready.


In reality, kids will potty train when they're good and ready to potty train. You can fight them for months (or years) until they come to the conclusion that it's better to sit on the throne to do their business, or you can simply keep changing diapers while you're waiting for them to have that revelation.

It's the fourth kid that tested me on that theory. Would he ever grasp the concept? How can you convey vague ideas like "feeling like you have to pee" to a kid who lives in a very concrete world? And we won't even discuss his level of stubborn, which goes hand in hand with his fierce independence. That indy streak screams "I'll do it my way or I won't do it at all!" It's not fun to deal with on a daily basis.

So, between my loathing of the potty training business, my procrastination on the issue, my laziness, and the fact that I'm too tired to fight the boy in my old age (there's a reason the baby of the family is spoiled), I just changed Micah's diapers daily. For over 6 years.

Over summer we made great strides in the potty department, but only after I introduced the idea, let him rebel, continued with the Pull-Up option, and then let him decide all on his own that potty training was a grand idea. And then just as suddenly as it started, it stopped.

Over Christmas break Micah decided that Pull-Ups were so 2009. He refused to wear them. And he stayed dry every day that he chose to go the underpants option. Tuesday was his first day back at school (thanks, snow day!) and I sent him in underpants. He came home in the same dry underpants.

While the end is certainly not here yet (but we're well on our way!), I am reminded of my potty training theory once again. If I wait long enough, the boy will potty train himself. Fingers crossed that he doesn't catch onto my little scheme.

18 comments:

Laski said...

Awe . . . man, remind me to never, ever, ever complain about changing 14 diapers (baby poop and JRs newly minted MAN poop) before noon.

As for stock in Huggies . . .you and me both.

Phew . . .

Karen said...

Laski - 14 diapers before noon? Dude, I'm sorry.

the planet of janet said...

go, micah.

and yeah, they weren't 6, but i did have kids in diapers still at 4.

when they were ready ... it was easy.

Jennifer said...

Add me to the stock in Huggies crowd, LOL.

Everytime I turn around my mother is fussing at me to get started on potty training someone. I just look at her and say nope. When they are ready, I will be ready. Otherwise I aint pushing it. I have to many other children, and to much other stuff going on to push it. If it is that important to her, SHE can come to Honduras and potty train, LOL.

With my first, like you Karen, 3 weeks before he was 2 my second was born. And I pushed him at potty training so that he was potty trained before Jordan was born. And he was potty trained, but he had lots of accidents. So in reality, it took him alot longer to potty train.

Am I making sense. Being back in the US (just for a couple of weeks) I am having trouble adjusting to speaking English in a clear way, LOL.

~Jennifer
http://followingmycatracho.blogspot.com

Karen said...

I so needed to read this today an I am struggling with my boys not being potty trained at almost 3 1/2. I am starting to get the comments from family about it. I will not relax and wait for them to potty train themselves. I pray you are right that this will eventually happen!
Thanks and Micah is such a blessing and I love you that you allow us to share in him through this great media we now have!

Andrea said...

I am so with you on this. My middle son was 2 when I took his passie away from him. He was okay with that, because he went to sucking his thumb! Grrrrr! he wasn't ready. So, now with my daughter, everyone tells me to take her pacifier away and she needs to be potty trained and I say, "She'll do it when she is ready!" I am okay with her wearing braces!! LOL

Trisha said...

Yeah! It sounds like Micah might be figuring out the whole potty training thing! I am so happy for him and you! I have my fingers crossed (and my toes) for you.

SunflowerMom said...

Good for you, Micah! I couldn't agree more with you Karen.

Burgh Baby said...

I would have vehemently disagreed with your theory before I had kids. Fortunately, once I was faced with spending my little time that I have with Alexis either potty training or playing, I figured it out real quick. I probably could have had her potty trained 6 months or even a year earlier, but I would have missed out on a whole lot of fun.

utmomof 5 said...

Keeping my fingers crossed that the diaper/pull up days are behind you!!!!

Karen said...

Few truer words have been spoken. My first one made me think it was going to be a breeze. At 18 months she told me she needed to go potty and that was it. Never an accident. Turns out she was just "ready". The rest of mine were a bit older....4,3,6.

Michelle said...

I'm just hoping this doesn't jinx anyting. How goes the sleeping? ;)

I'm so with you on the waiting. I did that with Mister Man -- he was 3 1/2 and finally decided to do it and POOF done. My mom started pushing Little Miss before she was 2 and ... we still have issues sometimes at 4 and almost a half. grrrr. Thanks, Mom.

Go you! And of course (again), go Micah!

Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

Go Micah! What a big boy he is becoming!

CC said...

YOU GO GUY!!!!!!

CanadianMama said...

14 years!! Holy Moley!

That is great for Micah. I'm hoping Chicken will figure this out for himself as well because I'm not really into fighting with him. Thing is, he always wins!

Michelle said...

keeping my fingers crossed that he's really ready for it!!

Betsy said...

I fully subscribe to that philosophy! Kids will train best when they are ready!! Yeah!! We just finished a full 6 and 1/2 years in diapers this summer and boy did it feel good!

JennyH said...

Congrats to you! Hoping he decides the potty is a cool thing and it stays that way!

After potty training Max I was tired of potty training. Joe is Very stubborn and it was not happening. I warned him that once he turned 4 he was too big for diapers. He was trained within a couple of weeks of turning 4!

Stubborn kids!!

Go Micah!