My Own Personal Photo Shoot at the DMV

My birthday was last month, for all those who missed it. Yeh, I'm another year older, but the wiser part is still up for debate. Maybe another year closer to insanity, though. But the point of this conversation is headed in the direction of my driver's license. It was up for renewal this year. I sent in the (exhorbitant) fee along with the paperwork and received the camera card. And there it sat, being totally ignored, while the kids were sick for weeks on end.

Since my license expired the day after my birthday, I thought it was high time to get my tail to the DOT and get that taken care of. I don't know about you, but the people at our DMV are hired on their stupidity and slowness. Having zero social skills is also a bonus. But this year it seems they've broken out of their box and hired someone who's actually competent, friendly and works faster than a melting glacier. I was thinking that I'd be in and out quickly despite the handful of people ahead of me.

The man being photographed when I got there was an elderly gentleman. As I was taking off my coat and trying to settle Micah into a "let's be happy here" phase I heard the lady behind the desk ask if he liked the photo or would like to re-do it. Wow. This was a new one on me. You know how your picture usually looks as though you just woke up with the flu after being up all night with a sick child? I SO appreciated that this employee actually looked at the pictures before processing the new license and if it was THAT bad she'd do a re-shoot.

But that isn't how it was at all. It seems that she just asks this as a courtesy. And it's very nice. But when the elderly gentleman asked to have it redone no less than 8 times I was thinking that he was very vain and she was very tolerant. I mean, there are those who aren't photogenic and then there are those who expect professional quality photography at the DMV. That ain't happenin' people. He did say at one point "thank you for being so patient." To which she replied, "no problem. I have all day."

ARRGGGHHHH

She truly does have all day, but the rest of us do not!

To help pass the time, Micah and I were snuggling and wrestling. (What? You don't sneak in snuggles when you wrestle?) He took shameless advantage of the snuggle and blew his nose on my shoulder. Nice. A black sweatshirt shows that up quite nicely. And then it was my turn to have my photo taken. I considered holding Micah since that's what I look like 79.6% of the time. And then I had a scary mom moment. If I renew this thing every 5 years, Micah would be 10!!!! I mentally picked myself up off the floor, gave myself mouth-to-mouth and checked my pulse, and then pulled myself back into the chair to have my mug shot taken. I think I look like a deer in the headlights thanks to my mental train of thoughts.

"How's that, do you want to do it over?"

In reality, the photo makes me look wider than the one I had taken 5 years ago, but it wasn't that bad. I accepted. I waited for the new license to be made, and I headed out the door.

After strapping Micah in his car seat I took a good look at the new picture. Somehow between the photo and the printing a smudge got on it, right at my eye. It looks like a very bad bruise. As if I'd been beaten. Niiiiiice. Along with the snot on my shoulder it's truly a classic. Let's just hope that I don't get pulled over any time soon.