Don't Play With Your Food

Micah somehow, somewhere got the idea that he can buy something every time I am at a checkout counter. His two choices are either a Hershey bar or a bag of Doritos. He knows the good stuff.

So we're at Wal-Mart yesterday and he chose a Hershey bar. Bless his dear little heart, he won't ever try to sneak one over on me. He always waves it in my face, clearly asking if he can have it. And most times he waits until I tell him before he tries scanning it himself. After I bag it, he has to go look in the bag to be sure it's there because sometimes, mysteriously, that candy bar vanishes somewhere between him handing it to me and it actually getting bagged. When he sees it in there, he looks at me and grins.

Yes, I am buying smiles from my children. Is it all that wrong?

Yesterday he took his chocolate from the bag and played with it while I finished checking out. He'd gotten a Big Block Bar for once, and I remember thinking, "Oooh, there's enough for me to share." He and his Big Block Bar were entertaining themselves grandly. He slid it along the checkout counter. He shoved it off the end and let it fall onto the floor. And repeated. And again. Oooh, how fun. It smacks on the floor like a belly flop every single time! He got overcome with his success and hugged it tightly in both hands. Actually it looked like he was choking it. The thing kinda scrunched up in his grip. I kinda cringed, thinking of the chocolate bits that would fall out and be lost forever when I gently opened the wrapper.

He grabbed one end of the candy bar and waved it frantically up and down. Since it was broken in the middle the other end merrily flapped away. He found this highly amusing. He wiggled it this way and that, banged it against the shopping cart, slapped it off the conveyor belt, slammed it on the floor.

The cashier was watching with something like amused horror on her face. I was thinking, "so much for sharing. There won't even be crumbs left to lick when he's done with it."

When we packed the groceries in the van and Micah was strapped in, he asked me to open his candy. I carefully peeled back a small corner and prepared to catch the chocolate dust that fell out. Those Big Block Bars are made of stiffer stuff than an average candy bar. It was only in three pieces and not so much damaged after all. I handed him a few squares and tucked the rest into my purse. There was no way that I was going to let him eat that much at once, and certainly not in my van. Any parent knows that kids and chocolate cant' be trusted together.

Today I was cleaning out my purse and found the remains of the chocolate bar. Total score. And totally shameless that I ate it.

23 comments:

Keri said...

I would totally have eaten it too. Remember the DQ birthday cake? I polished it off by hiding behind the laptop screen at the kitchen counter.

mwahahahahaha!!!

Michelle said...

Wow. After it survived that much abuse, I'm not sure I'd have been able to eat it. I like my food more ummm natural? Oh, who am I kidding? I'd totally have eaten it!

AutoSysGene said...

It's chocolate...what else were you supposed to do with it!!

This gives new meaning to taking candy from babies, huh? :)

Unknown said...

I think chocolate actually tastes better when you have forgotten you had it and then find it! MMMMMMM chocolate :)

Flea said...

Good for you!

pb&j in a bowl said...

Total score! I found the remnants of a Snickers bar in the console of my truck. I ate it without thinking and then realized I couldn't remember the last time I bought a Snickers bar.

Momisodes said...

SCORE! It's like finding an unexpected $5 bill in a coat pocket :) So glad there was still some left to share!

SunflowerStories said...

hee hee! lucky you! my 6 y.o. is a Hershey bar addict, it is tough to get him to share a single square.

Andrea said...

I would have eaten it too!! hee hee hee! What a great find!! I love it when that happens!

Julie said...

I would have done that and I would have told my child when he asked the he had eaten all of it, remember????

Lynn C Mama to 3 said...

I say finding a chocolate bar in your purse that is only a day old is like finding a 20 in your jeans after washing.

CC said...

Of course you ate it!

Too bad it didn't disappear into dust. Maybe he would have learned not to play with it in the future. Or maybe not...

KG said...

Happiness for you AND him? Total parenting success. Hawt.

HalfAsstic.com said...

Had that been my purse, the chocolate bar would have never lasted 24 hours. You have staying power, my dear!

Danyele Easterhaus said...

there's no disgrace in licking out the bottom of your purse when it's covered in chocolate...that's all i'm saying!

Anonymous said...

Around here that would have produced a "Score!" loud enough to wake the dead!

Maria (also Bia) said...

I love it that he had so much fun with a candy bar...I could feel his pure joy from over here.

the planet of janet said...

how great that he got so much bang for his big block!

and how even greater that you scored some for yourself. bwahahahaha!!!!!

Brandie said...

No shame in it at all. I love using my kids to feed my chocolate additction!

Karen Deborah said...

He's got ya right where he wants ya that little charmer.

Leanne said...

Ah yeah! That's the only reason we buy them chocolate, so that we can have some too.

Oh, and I spit my tea all over my keyboard when I read your comment on my blog that you want a dog. How the heck many do you have woman? I'm coming to you for ADVICE. Too funny.

Shellie said...

That's called having smiles and eating them too! Total score.

Debbie @ Three Weddings said...

I am not alone! Yesterday I was desperate for something to snack on. I remembered Peanut had a candybar in the cabinet that she really didn't know about. She can't eat chocolate without A LOT of drooling. Plus, I'd never let her eat the whole thing, either so I kept putting it off giving her any. It's gone. It was good and she didn't get a bite. I ate it all while she napped. [insert evil laugh here]