BlogHer, Home Edition

For all those who haven't headed to BlogHer this week, I'm here to fill the void. (I know, just what you wanted, right?) But I've been around here long enough to learn a few things and just thought I'd share with you.


1. Write like nobody is reading.

While we're all in it just for the comments (whether we admit to it or not), the key is to write for yourself. If you try to be somebody that you aren't to impress others, it becomes noticeably fake. The most compelling story that you can tell is the one that is real. Somehow, fiction cannot hold a candle to real life, even if real life is losing your patience while in the grocery store with four kids in tow. That's what makes people relate to you. It's what makes them come back. It's what forges friendships. Be real.



2. Write like everybody is reading.

I know what I just said, but the fact is that a blog is public reading material. Maybe not the bathroom variety (at least my laptop doesn't go there), but it's out there for the whole world to see. When you're writing, remember that every word is public and even if nobody you know reads, it's there waiting to be stumbled upon. You never want to be ashamed of what you've written. If you would never say it out loud, don't write it down. If you don't want your in-laws to know, don't say it. (Hi, Freda!) If you don't want your friends to know, don't put it out there. Be honest, be kind, be above shame.

3. If you won't say it on your blog, you probably shouldn't say it on another blog.

This is a personal peeve of mine, and maybe it's just that. While I have nothing against guest blogging, I do have issues with using someone else's private space to air your conscience. If someone hacks you off and you need to spout, call a friend. Email a relative that you can talk to. Have coffee with a close co-worker. But if you're ashamed to say it on your own blog, you shouldn't be saying it on someone else's blog. Remember, blogs are public domain.

Does this really need to be said?

4. Reciprocate the love.

Common blogging courtesy says that if someone comments on your blog, you go comment on theirs. (I try, really I do!) I understand (trust me, I do) that we get busy from time to time (like all summer) and it's difficult to follow someone with any kind of regularity. But a little show of love every now and then goes a long way. Also? Comment on their post. Don't use someone else's blog to push your business, or your cause, or your personal convictions.

Go. Write something. And make it real.



15 comments:

HalfAsstic.com said...

OKAY! GOOD ONE AND WELL SAID! Now, the first thing I can think of that I want to say is:
I want to see the rest of that horse's head... ;-)

utmomof 5 said...

Amen to all you said! And well said too :)

Mommy to those Special Ks said...

This is a GREAT post!!! One thing I always say before you hit that publish button is to ask yourself, "Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?" And if you can't answer yes to all of them maybe you need to reconsider. If you can't answer yes to at LEAST the first 2, then DON'T hit publish. I definitely publish some things that are just silly and probably not necessary, but I will never lie and I'll never be mean. Anyway, great post! :)

The Sports Mama said...

Okay, okay.... I KNOW I'm kinda sucky about giving the comment love back. In fact, I'm pretty sure this is the only time you've heard from me this week. :)

Or not. I'll be honest here... I'm not really keepin' track. :)

I do agree that we should all write for ourselves. Didn't most of us start blogging for ourselves, anyway?

Flea said...

I've been withholding all week - both my own blog and others. But everything you've said is dead on. Except that when I've guest blogged? I make fun. Heh. Oops.

Pam said...

Who needs blog her- we have you! And, uhm, the comment love, yeah, uhm, sorry. I have been reading- I really have. I just uhm, yeah, I've been slacking. Oops! There has to be a way I can blame my hubby for that though, right?? Great post!

Chelsie said...

I've been lurking for a while but just wanted to say that I love your blog. It always brings a smile to my face and always makes me remember when I was growing up.

Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

This post is EXACTLY why you are my blogging hero! Thank you for the reminders about what consistutes good blogging behavior (if only I had had it a few months ago when I was bagging on my in-laws . . . who now appear to be regular readers - such is life.)

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

That was one wise horse. Related to Mr. Ed perhaps?

Aimee said...

This was tres excellent, mama!! I agree with the whole kit and kaboodle, and even though I have been really bad at commenting lately, I still read you every day :)

Jennifer said...

What a great reminder of these things :)

SunflowerMom said...

Well said! And I must say, I love that you often email replies to your comments. Love it!

Shellie said...

Perfect advice!

Burgh Baby said...

I have been a giant failure at #4 for about a year now, but it is what it is. Still, I say, "BRAVO!"

Tanya said...

I'm so happy #4 is now a written rule, not just a general practice that I participate in.

PS. I'm not sure when you did the redesign (because I usually read through my google feed), but its really nice.