Potted

There are a few downsides to living in a multi-dog family. The first is the hair. WORD, the hair. On the worst days, it is infused with a life of it's own, and while it hasn't attacked us in our sleep yet, I know it's just biding it's time. I have the best vacuum ever, and while Mr. Dyson (yes, I call him by his proper name, he prefers it that way) does a bang-up job, the dogs find perverse joy in walking behind me as I vacuum, shedding a new trail.

Another downside of the dogs is the fact that on occasion one (or more) of them decide that being housebroken is overrated. While I am loving the hardwood floor for it's cleanability in this respect, the dogs are onto me. They seek out the few scatter rugs that I have and pee on them. On purpose. Not all the time, thank goodness, but enough.

Micah doesn't help with this problem of Who Peed On The Floor! because when he decides that going diaperless is so five minutes ago and needs to pee, he just pees. I am once again on the floor wiping up a mess.

Try not to be jealous. There are plenty of puddles to share.

So while in the kitchen the other day, we've been catching whiffs of urine. It was unappetizing. We determined that the rug at the sink had a wet spot on it, and tossed it into the washer.

That was Day 1.

Luke was eating breakfast and smelled The Nasty. Being a 9 year old boy, he wondered if A) Micah wet the bed and he smelled from that, and B) if he accidentally wet himself and didn't know it. Of course, being a 9 year old boy, he didn't share these thoughts with anyone until the next day. Nine year old boys are fun that way.

That was Day 2.

Today we were shopping all day with my parents while Micah was in school and the dogs were in lockdown. We came home, unpacked bags, let the dogs outside, and smelled It. And that's when Becky leaned over to smell the flowers that I had on the kitchen counter.

When your nose is right there in the blossoms, you could close your eyes and easily imagine that you're in a truck stop restroom. Someday I will ask God why orchids need to smell like urine.

On Day 3 we moved those flowers to an obscure corner of an unused room.

12 comments:

imbeingheldhostage said...

I am NOT laughing. It just looks like it. I know it looks like I am about to burst out laughing but I would never do that to you. Excuse me, I think there's something in my eye and I need to leave for a few minutes too check on it...

nice flowers, K. Please don't send me any.

Becoming Mommy said...

That's hysterical.
But also explains alot!

My husband is of the constant beleif that there is a pee puddle somewhere, even before Sasha. Our dogs have more or less always been housebroken (the hound took a whopping 3 days) so there isn't any actual pee.

However, I collect orchids. Hmmm...

Viv said...

I spend a whole bunch of my days just like you describe, the only difference is, I've never been lucky enough for the flowers to have been the culprits.

Unknown said...

I am so jealous of you...I love cleaning up pee spots. :)

caramama said...

Haha!

We have no throw rugs or bathmats or really anything cloth on any hard floor. Because of our cat. He loves to pee on anything soft that is on a hard floor. I miss throw rugs in the kitchen and bath mats in our bathrooms, but I was so sick of cleaning up pee. Now the worst is if a coat or hat or scarf either doesn't get hung up in the hallway or falls down, the cat will pee on it.

But thank you, because now I know not to put any orchids in the house, as well as throw rugs.

Cecily R said...

Now there's a fact to put in my Gee Whiz! file. Orchids smell like pee. And they're so pretty!!

Burgh Baby said...

And THAT is why I don't have any orchids. True story.

JennyH said...

Funny!! I don't have any orchids. But I can relate to the clean spots!

Dogs-- why go outside when it's freezing to do the business!? My dog drives me crazy like that. She will not get off the deck to go in the grass. So then she gets confined to the kitchen. There is only so much pee and poop one person can handle in a life time!

Flea said...

Oh how sad! My orchids don't smell like that. They're behind the sink. My farting dogs? They smell. Right now.

Glad you found the smell.

Anonymous said...

We only have one dog and the hair is enough to make me want to shave him . . . I couldn't imagine having a whole pack!

Why must such beautiful flowers smell so offensive?! Several months ago I had a bouquet on the kitchen table and wasted a good 30 minutes searching for the diaper that I was sure was hidden somewhere in the kitchen!

Michelle said...

I know I shouldn't snicker. But hey -- at least my black thumb comes in handy for something, right? I wonder if you could somehow perfume them....

Roger Miller said...

Taking a note and mentally holding onto it... No orchids. Thanks.