The Two Day, Speech-Inspiring Poop Saga

Micah was supposed to be in bed last night when he, instead, showed up in our bedroom with his pants down around his ankles. This is generally a sign that he needs after-potty assistance. But of course things weren't as easy as a simple wipe and send on your way. He must not have been feeling all that well because there were leftovers on his underpants, and it wasn't in the solid state. I changed his clothes and sent him back to bed. Except he insisted that I follow him to the bathroom first.

Yoi, the yuck. The toilet was a lake of brown liquid; nothing solid except a few pieces of toilet paper. I did what anyone would do - I flushed. I was a bit horrified to see it rise instead of fall, so I called for backup. That was a clear Daddy-type job. Micah seemed proud of his mess, as he told Daddy "I-ya!" before heading off to bed.

Daddy tried unplugging the mess, but it wasn't to be unplugged. There was ranting and raving and much speculation about what could be stuck in the pipes before finally deciding that locking that bathroom door until a sewer snake could be procured would be the best option.

Day 2 finds Daddy kneeling in front of the porcelain throne, threading the snake down the pipes, trolling for something solid enough to do damage. Micah was instantly aware that it was a continuation of yesterday's fun, so he said "I-ya did that." Only it wasn't that clear. But being parents, we are becoming amazingly adept at interpreting that boy.

This happened in the kids' bathroom, mind you, and I am a firm believer in making the kids clean up after themselves. The flaw in this plan is the fact that kids aren't very good at that, and I'm not very good at follow-up. The bathroom is generally avoided by adults, so the level of disgust was beyond words. Daddy put the kids in charge of cleaning after the toilet paper roll bar thingy (official name) was fished out of the insides of the toilet.

My kids were abducted by aliens and replaced by robots, and I have proof, because they cleaned happily together (all 4 of them!) without grumbling or falling to fighting amongst themselves. This has happened exactly NEVER in the 15 years we've been parents. And the bathroom got cleaned. Bonus.

Micah wanted in on the cleaning action, so he grabbed a sponge and started scrubbing the wall. Wanting recognition for his work, he showed Becky, then asked for a high five. Becky, ever the encourager, told Micah to show mom his good job. So he did. He came downstairs and requested that I come follow him. He pointed happily to the well scrubbed wall and said, "I did a good job cleaning that!" I have 3 other kids who witnessed the sentence. He got double high-fives for the good job. He did a better job with speech than he did with cleaning, just for the record.

I don't know why I'm shocked that the boy is speaking in full sentences. I mean, he's nearly 8 years old, and he's not stupid. I guess I'm still stuck in the mindset that kids learn to talk by babbling, then trying out a few words, then gradually putting a few together to make nonstop yakkity yak. That would make me the stupid one, failing to learn from my boy who is contantly trying to teach me a new and better way. But I do have the part of Proud Mama down pat.

Sitting pretty

(And also, how sad is it that puppies sit still enough for good photos with my crap lens when Micah does not?)

3 comments:

Trisha said...

Yeah! Not about having to fish things from the toilet - but about that amazing sentence. Good job, Micah!

Flea said...

LOL! We had to have a plumber (BIL) in for a little Darth Vader that a kid shoved into the hole in the front of the toilet bowl. Gah.

Driven To Distraction said...

The paper and the cardboard dowel can go in the toilet, why not the thing it hangs on?! Way to go, Micah on the talking! I has been truly awesome to read about his progress and to know how much he has overcome to talk!

(And I was much, much older than Micah when I flushed a nightlight down the toilet. It was a total accident, but my mother loves to bring it up on a regular basis.)