Life Lessons Through Tragedy

I am an eternal optimist. And I have faith that God is always in control no matter what. That faith, coupled with my God-given optimism, helps me see life as an adventure even when things are far more adventurous than I sometimes care to live. I also think of life as a large learning curve. Here are some things I learned today.

The morning after is almost harder than the night of. I laid awake most of the night thinking how hard it would be to look out my windows in the morning and not see the barn there. It was every bit as hard as I  knew it would be. I cried harder than I did last night. Last night I had shock keeping tears in check. This morning it was unhindered. And healing.

Hay will smolder for days, despite the unreal amounts of water being sprayed on it for hours and hours and hours...

When there are masses of people at the farm coming and going all day long, I will have the need to feed them. It's what I do. I will also make it my personal responsibility to make sure dad eats because in his grief he will completely forget that it's something he needs to do. I am a woman on a mission. Because I am a woman on a mission to feed the masses, I will have no food in my house. At all. Not milk, not bread, not much of anything.

The total lack of food is not a problem at all because friends and family will swarm the place and bring so much food that you'll wonder what on earth you'll ever do with it. Local restaurants and groceries will donate food and supplies and make you marvel at the family feel we have in our small farming community. And you'll be incredibly grateful because there are masses of men to feed, and more will be coming in the days ahead to help with the clean-up.

When everyone is still reeling from a bit of shock, it will take four otherwise very competent women to assemble a meal and feed the men. And it will be disorganized and very unpretty.

When there are many children, they will entertain themselves and the grown-ups can kind of keep a half eye on them. Also, despite smoldering hay and what looks like a horridly dangerous place to play, a burnt barn is rather an interesting place for kids to learn in.

Kids will be allowed to do things that they otherwise would not be able to do. Like walk in a burned barn and poke in smoldering hay. Or play in mud puddles.

Life will go on. We will laugh and joke and learn that family is there for support, and neighbors step up to fill in the gaps. And at the end of the day, we will count so many blessings that we forget that we were to be mourning a loss. God is good, and so much bigger than anything life can throw at us.